On Anger, Hypocrisy, and Spirituality

I feel like a phony and pretender at times.

I talk about waking up and spiritual progress, but when it comes to anger and bruised ego, I become an out-of-control elephant.

I can’t regulate my emotions and instincts, and I’m talking about becoming a whole explorer!

The games played at home, in the office, and outside often overwhelm me.

I try to be nice with everyone regardless of ABC, but people take advantage and I end up getting hurt.

So, I try to build walls and boundaries and do tit-for-tat.

Take revenge.

What an impostor and a hypocrite I am!

Compassion changes everything

But if I treat myself with compassion, the story changes.

So what if my emotional brain hijacks the rational one! I was programmed like that!

Becoming awakened doesn't mean attaining emotional mastery.

Can't I read and discuss spiritual mastery then?

I wouldn't call it hypocrisy.

Is mastery over the emotional brain a prerequisite to undertake the spiritual journey?

Didn't the awakened beings get angry at vices?

Of course they did!

Becoming awakened doesn't mean attaining emotional mastery.

The meditation junkies can claim to have attained that woo-woo state of non-anger, but they’re sleeping!

What I can do

I can be more forgiving and less reactive.

I can take a more contemplative action.

I can be more open and vulnerable even if it hurts.

I read recently that:

Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that crushed it.

Isn't it sweet?

That's how I should be! But when bombarded repeatedly, you begin to ask, "How many times do I have to forgive my 'well-wishers'?"

What do you think?

How do you react when you’re hurt?

Do you seek sweet revenge or surrender?

Should you teach your 'well-wishers' or even loved ones a lesson sometimes?

Will you teach 'them' a lesson even if they're super close and can hurt you back?